Analysis of Mary Jane: The unmarried woman

Being Mary Jane…. I believe that most females could relate to parts of the new BET show, Being Mary Jane, starring Gabrielle Union. I definitely found myself identifying with several parts of the show as it related to being an unmarried female. The show started off indicating that at least 42% of African-American women are single. Well, I guess I am in that number. I remember growing up, dreaming of the day that I would marry the man of dreams. I had written out my life plan and just knew I would be married in my 20s. Wrong… Now in my 30s, I am still an unmarried African-American female. I often hear, “when are you getting married?” “You haven’t gotten married yet?” “What are you waiting on?” Well life has it own way of messing up our blueprint for our lives. I remember God saying, “You can make all the plans you want, but I have the final say.” So I am an unmarried woman waiting in God’s timing. Mary Jane finds herself engaging in intimacy with a man that she does not know is married until she stumbles unto his wedding ring. How often have single women desiring to be married been deceived by married men, claiming to be single? Growing up, it used to be that a girl would be wondering if the guy she likes has another girl on the side. But now older women have to deal with meeting men and wondering if he is married. I once encountered a man who was interested in me and when I asked if he was seeing anyone, he stated, “No.” During many conversations something just didn’t seem right. He would talk to me during the day, but at night he was nowhere to be found. When I asked if he was married, he told me he was divorced. He would ask to take me out, but later call to say he couldn’t make it. After many disappointments, I realized that there had to be someone else. Later, I would find out that this man was married with a family. At one point, in my life I began wondering if I was a magnet for married men, because they were coming at every angle. Most times, we as women become so impatient that we settle for less and become entangled in a meaningless relationship with no promise. Most likely the married man will never leave his wife for the woman on the side and all the woman on the side will ever be is convenience. Meaning that when I want you, you are there and when I don’t, my wife is there. I can come to you for the things that my wife don’t or won’t do, while keeping you with the dream in your heart that I’ll leave her when I know I never will. Patience is a true virtue. Women and men like to play cat and mouse games that can end all wrong. Yes, we all have the desire to be in an intimate relationship and have children. But, waiting on God will save us a lot of time and heartache. Being in a rush can have long-lasting consequences. Guess we will see what will happen to Mary Jane…

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